Sunday regurgitation for April 26, 2009: My brother, the bartending hacker

by Creative Junkie on April 26, 2009

For those of you wondering why Sunday is throwing up, fear not. Sunday Regurgitation occurs every Sunday, when I link to a prior post of mine, because I am trapped under something heavy and am unable to write anything original or riveting. Hopefully someone will notice I’m missing, remove whatever is suffocating me and I’ll be back to normal by tomorrow. But just in case … think of me fondly.

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Circa 1967

Circa 1967

I am biding my time over here on the east coast until 3:30 p.m., so that I can call my brother on the west coast at 12:30 p.m., his time.

And the reason I’m calling him at 3:30 p.m., is because a few Firefox users have told me that when they leave me a comment, the comment appears funky and not in a good way but rather, in an UMMMM, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON kind of way. And I’m allergic to anything that looks remotely like UMMMM, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON, hence my nose job at age 21.

And the reason I’m calling him at 3:30 p.m., as opposed to any other time, is because he works nights as a bartender in Las Vegas and when his shift ends, he attends after hours parties in search of 1) Miss Right, in case my mother is reading this; or 2) Miss All Sorts of Wrong With A Big Rack, in case my mother is not reading this. In any case, he most likely won’t have a coherent thought in his dehydrated body until at least 11:00 a.m., so by waiting until 12:30 p.m., I’m giving him a little extra time to gather his wits about him and 1) propose marriage to Miss Right, in case my mother is reading this; or 2) propose something entirely different to Miss All Sorts, in case my mother is not reading this.

And the reason I’m calling him at 3:30 p.m.,. and not somebody else, is because he is a whiz at customizing Thesis, the WordPress theme I used for my blog redesign. Thanks to my brother, I did not have to yank out my cerebellum through my ear canal and knead it like dough and shove it back into my skull. Not even a little!

Well, OK. Maybe a smidgen. Nothing that a few strategically placed hairs won’t cover.

If you are in need of a new site or a redesign and are considering Thesis, check out my brother’s tutorial site here: Thesis Hacker. Tell him his sister referred you out of the goodness of her heart. And the expectation that the next time she visits Vegas, she’ll be a guest of the Venetian, courtesy of the bartender who’d rather his 78 year old mother remained ignorant of Miss All Sorts.

You don’t have to mention that second part.

Unless you want to.

And now I leave you with a post I wrote about my brother, from way back when my blog was in its infancy: He aint heavy … or short or overweight or prematurely grey. He’s my brother …

He’s still my twin and he still isn’t heavy or short or overweight or prematurely grey.

Life is not fair.

At all.

But I love him anyway. Especially if he can rid my blog of anything that looks in any way, shape or form like UMMM, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON.

Circa 2005

Circa 2005

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