I can kill a houseplant in 2.3 days but I have managed to keep alive one female human being for over fifteen years and another one for almost nine and because of that, I get breakfast in bed once a year.
And these:
And these:
We have our Mother’s Day morning routine down to a science by now:
7:00 am: Helena and Zoe creep into our room and poke Nate and quietly whisper in his ear IS IT TIME?
7:01 am: Nate mumbles not yet, rolls over and falls back into his coma.
7:15 am: The girls creep back in and loudly whisper from ten feet away IS IT TIME NOW?
7:15 am: Nate says bbblllggrrrrrzzzzzzzzzztph and snores.
7:30 am: The girls march into our room and poke Nate until he bleeds and then drag him out of bed and downstairs.
7:31 am: Lots of banging in the kitchen. Possible smell of smoke. Exclamations of YUCK and EWWWW, NOT WITH YOUR FINGERS!
7:45 am: I am delivered breakfast and showered in bed with cards and presents and hugs and kisses and then scrutinized very closely while I eat to make sure I really like it and then ultimately asked how it feels to sleep in.
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I really like my family. I think I’ll keep them.
For all of you moms, whether your children are on the inside of your tummy kicking the snot out of your bladder or on the outside of your tummy kicking the snot out of each other, or somewhere far away, I wish you all a Happy Moms Day!
And for all of you who could not care less about Moms Day, I wish you a Happy Sunday!
And by the way … pssssssssssssssssssst: you still have a couple of hours to click HERE and get in on my custom line art giveaway which ends at 5:00 p.m. tonight!
Later, gators.
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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Very similar to our house. Two years ago, not only was there smoke (ie burnt pancakes) but the girls actually managed to explode the ceramic top of the oven. So I guess you could say I even got a new oven for Mothers’ Day!!
Twitter: heather_t_
May 10, 2009 at 3:08 am
Aww, happy Mother’s day, you funniest of mothers! =)
Twitter: MissusSmith
May 10, 2009 at 6:42 am
Happy Mother’s Day to you, my dear!
I myself have been dropping major, major hints about a certain bakery in town, but from the smell of eggs cooking downstairs, I don’t think carrot cake is on my breakfast menu…
Hope you have a fantastic day!
This awesome…great mother’s day gift! Yup and I love my kids.
I have thoroughly enjoyed visiting your blog today. Thanks for the smiles.
Happy Mother’s Day to you, too.
Glad you enjoyed this day
OMG this is so wonderful! you are one lucky girl!
Happy Moms Day (we had ours in March!)
Twitter: sixfeetunder
May 10, 2009 at 11:59 am
Happy Mother’s day!!!
Happy Mother’s Day Andy!!! No breakfast in bed for me today….just 5 hrs of OT and a $50 Starbucks giftcard
Twitter: eclecticred
May 10, 2009 at 4:47 pm
awww…Happy Mother’s Day kiddo! I got breakfast in bed too!! Of course I was awake for about 2 hours locked in my closed room waiting and waiting AND waiting! In the end it was all worth it as my youngest son wrote a poem about me which included the line “My mom weighs 40 pounds.”!! LOL!!
I hope you have a wonderful Mother’s Day!!
My girls made me breakfast on Mother’s Day….at 5:00pm. LOL!
And a Happy Belated Mother’s Day to you, right back! Love your hilarious blog.
So by the time my kids are a little older they should have the routine down right?
Sounds like a good start to the day to me! Happy Mother’s Day!