A woman went into a store to buy her husband a pet for his birthday.
After looking around, she found that all the pets were very expensive.
She told the clerk she wanted to buy a pet, but she didn’t want to spend a fortune.
“Well,” said the clerk, “I have a very large bullfrog. They say it’s been trained to give blow jobs!”
“Blow jobs?” the woman exclaimed.
“It hasn’t been proven but we’ve sold thirty of them this month, so far,” he said.
The woman thought it would be a great gag gift, and hey, if it was true … no more blow jobs for her!
She bought the frog.
When she explained the frog’s ability to her husband, he was extremely skeptical and simply laughed it off.
Nevertheless, the woman went to bed happy, thinking she may never need to perform this less than riveting act again.
In the middle of the night, she was awakened by the noise of pots and pans flying everywhere, making hellacious banging and crashing sounds. She ran downstairs to the kitchen, only to find her husband and the frog engrossed in reading cookbooks.
“What are you two doing up at this hour?” she demanded.
The husband replied, “If I can teach him to cook … you’re gone.”
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(courtesy of my dirty minded friend, Deb Wisker)
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Just a quickie today, everyone! We all need a quickie every once in awhile, don’t you think? At least, that’s what Nate keeps telling me.
Happy Labor Day!
And to those who do not celebrate Labor Day … Happy Monday!
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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
Twitter: MissusSmith
September 7, 2009 at 6:52 am
Heh.
Happy last day of summer vacay, as that is what we (and surprisingly this includes the kid) are super-dooper-looper (to quote Kiddo) excited that tomorrow is the first day of school.
Lunch Friday?
Twitter: MissusSmith
September 7, 2009 at 6:54 am
Wow, me not write the good English this early in the morning:
*…..as that is what we are celebrating (and surprisingly this includes the kid), and we are thus all super-dooper-looper (to quote Kiddo) excited…..,
Clearly, I need caffeine. And lunch on Friday.
Twitter: MissusSmith
September 7, 2009 at 6:57 am
One last thing, and then I’ll stop harassing your poor, innocent comments section.
That song? The one you reference in the title of this post? Is one of the worst earworms in my existence. So, my family now thanks you that they will get to hear me sing, hum or whistle it all. day. long! Heck, if I’m feeling particularly inspired, I might even bang out an accompaniment on the piano……….
JOY TO THE WORLD!
ALLLLLL THE BOYS AND GIRLS NOW!
JOY TO THE FISHIES IN THE DEEP, BLUE SEA,
AND JOOOOOY TO YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU
AND MEEEEEEEEEEE!
Damn Heather, now you’ve got me singing it. Very funny joke Andrea.
Twitter: ScrapprsWkshp
September 7, 2009 at 9:27 am
I know, I’ve been singing it since I read the title in my RSS reader. Love the joke. You think it’s all bullfrogs or just that one? (Standing here with my galoshes on and net in hand).
Thanks for the great laugh this morning! and Jenn White, the commentor above made me chuckle too!
just dropping by from SITS to say hi; hope you’ll do the same.
LOL. I’m singing with everyone else, “Joy to the World…”
rofl….so funny
Lol! Cute!! Hey! I’m mobile now! I’m during my lunch break? Got a “crackberry” for my b-day!
Twitter: Gaither
September 7, 2009 at 5:14 pm
Oh. My. God. I laughed so hard that I almost choked on a Dorito!! I had to read it to my husband and he laughed too….then he asked, “Wouldn’t it be awesome if that thing about the frogs was true?”. He’s sick.
Omigosh…I about pee’d my pants because I was laughing so hard reading your blog postings. I love your sense of humor and ability to make lemonade outta lemons as they say. I’ve had that same conversation about parents having sex except it was with my DH when we were discussing our parents!! He was absolutely mortified with the thought that our parents (who are in their 60′s) might actually still do “IT”!
I luff this! My brother is Jeremiah, and he was just stationed in outside of Baghdad (malad) about a 2 months ago, he will love this! i will put this in my next care package.
thanks for making me smile today! have a wonderful labor day evening!
You just crack me up. I love reading your blog.. Makes me bust out everytime. Thanks for being you!
Twitter: householdsix
September 8, 2009 at 6:47 am
LOL that’s funny! The husband forgot about laundry though. It doesn’t magically appear clean. I wish it did though.
Stopping by to say “hi” from SITS.
sweetjeanette.blogspot.com
As soon as I saw the title I knew where you were going!
Thanks for the credit my friend!
HAHA, what a great joke!
Just dropping in from SITS.
Love it! TFS!
My ex-FIL told this joke at a family function. Can you say “inappropriate and awkward”?
God, I miss that guy.
That was hilarious! I’ll have to find someone to pass it on to that will appreciate it.