THE GOOD
I am once again within one pound of goal weight, having just come off a fat-infested week where I celebrated two birthdays and gained a pound each for my efforts. I hope to make goal weight next week and then go on maintenance for six weeks and then I will finally post before and after photos of me. Hopefully by then, I’ll have a decent haircut and clothes that do not make me look like a hamper on the The Biggest Loser.
I created a Facebook fan page! All by myself! And I spiraled out of control only twice with delusional episodes where I made a Molotov cocktail out of my computer and launched it into space via a potato canon I stole from the teenage boys next door.
Click the image above and you’ll be brought to my fan page where you have the option to “like” it if you so choose since Facebook no longer has the option to “become a fan.” I guess they figured it was too convoluted a concept for humans to grasp.
Doh! I are smart!
.
LOOKIT, LOOKIT, LOOKIT! It’s a Nikon D90 a/k/a my new baby and a 70-300mm zoom lens, courtesy of my wonderful Nate on my birthday! The camera strap, from PhatStraps, was my parents’ gift to me, together with two ProMaster UV filters. And in two minutes, my mother is going to call me and ask We got you what? What the hell is a strap for and why is it fat? And pro what? Did you take up golf again?
Thanks, guys! You know, continuing the supersonic descent into my forties isn’t so bad when there’s stuff like this to cushion the fall.
.
THE BAD
Oliver wriggled out of Zoe’s arms and fell onto our hardwood floors the other day and his yelp made my stomach lurch so badly, I thought it was going to come flying out of my mouth and splash onto the wall. Four months ago, if you had told me that I was capable of getting so emotionally attached to a small fuzzy creature that did not burst forth out of my own womb, I would have laughed in your face and then taken your temperature. Rectally, if you were being really annoying about it.
Although Oliver was able to put weight on his leg after his fall, he was limping pretty badly so I called the vet who advised me to watch him carefully and if he didn’t improve within a couple of hours, to bring him into the emergency office for an x-ray. I hung up the phone and yanked my eyeballs out of their sockets and glued them onto Oliver’s body whereby I proceeded to watch him like a hawk, lest I miss any indication that he needed immediate medical attention. Like, if his leg suddenly fell off in the kitchen or something.
For the next couple of hours, I watched him limp around the living room, limp around the office, limp onto my lap and ultimately limp out the door to go potty whereupon he experienced sudden onset HALLELUJAH! I’M HEALED and starting chasing a leaf around the yard. I decided he didn’t need immediate medical attention after all. Per my vet’s instructions, I’m continuing to watch him carefully and if his leg does, in fact, plummet to the ground independent of his body, I’ll rush him in. In the meantime, his limp is noticeably improved and my heart is back to beating its normal 137 beats per minute instead of 290.
.
THE UGLY
.
Spring has finally come to upstate New York and with it, birds with irritable bowel syndrome and freakishly accurate aim.
.
.
Like it? Share it! Karma rocks:
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice! I LOVE my D90. <3 If you're looking into more lenses… I love the 50mm 1.4 and Tamron 90mm 2.8 macro.
I love you. Thats it. Pure unadulterated love for how you express yourself.
Thanks for the big fat smile I’m wearing.
Oh, and suck it and you fancy camera. Better be hooking us up w/ some sweet pics!
.-= Mads Mom’s last blog post is here ..Where the hell I’ve been =-.
Twitter: barbhogan
April 29, 2010 at 6:27 pm
Congrats on the new baby! He’s beautiful! And I’m glad O-man is okay. One pound, I’m jealous. Fat and jealous, that is.
.-= Barb’s last blog post is here ..Ice, Ice, Baby! =-.
Twitter: MissusSmith
April 29, 2010 at 6:53 pm
Jealous of your camera. Already “liked” your FB fanpage (and pissed I have to be a stalker and can’t just be a damn fan anymore, sheesh), had my heart in my throat until I read the bit about Oliver’s Hallelujah! I’m healed! moment, WHEW!, and dude, no kidding about the freaking birds. Our driveway is freaking POLKA-DOTTED now. It just makes me glad that this isn’t one year ago, when we first moved in and had all sorts of extraneous stuff in the garage and therefore had to leave our cars in the driveway for like a month. As much as I dislike the polka-dotted look, I’d rather it be on the asphalt (or whatever the heck they make driveways out of) than on my minivan.
Oh, and the only way I’ll achieve any sort of goal weight is if my goal is to weigh as much as the elephants in the zoo.
You, however, look fantabulous – and you know I know this is true even without the photos since I’ve seen you in person recently (but not recently enough – lunch soon?).
.-= Heather @ nobody-but-yourself’s last blog post is here ..Spring FAIL =-.
Very nice camera! I want to get one of those Phat Straps
.-= stacey@Havoc&Mayhem’s last blog post is here ..Wordy Wednesday =-.
Ick. Bird poop!
Congrats on your fan page. I need to set up something like that…if I ever get that publishing deal I’m working toward! I think Facebook decided more people would be inclined to participate if they did “like” instead of “fan,” and they must be right…all I ever see on there these days are people saying they like things!
.-= Stephanie Faris’s last blog post is here ..Addicted to Our Cell Phones? =-.
Twitter: osvme
April 30, 2010 at 8:23 am
oooo that is a sexeh camera. can i has it? xD
.-= Jenny’s last blog post is here ..My small holiday =-.
Twitter: kearsie
April 30, 2010 at 9:38 am
I’m here to tell you that if my green Oldsmobile is parked in a lot of 80 cars, mine is the one tagged as the toilet by all the birds. I’m fairly certain that the cracks in the windshield and rust on the hood are just avian shorthand spelling out BET YOU CAN’T HIT THIS ONE.
omg! poor baby. hope he gets better. and congrats on getting to your goal weight!!! woo hoo!!! and the cam. yum!
Here’s the great thing about your 40′s – you gradually start realizing what’s important and let go of the stupid stuff you obsessed about when younger [clothes, hair, etc.]. At least, I hope that’s true for you…
I refuse to wear makeup or pantyhose any more and it’s very freeing…
That camera scares me. OTOH, I hope to see more photos here soon…
.-= Dee’s last blog post is here ..Three Easy, Tasty One Dish Meals =-.
Love your camera, even though I wouldn’t even know how to turn it on. LOL
Poor Oliver, good thing he isn’t hurt. You would have to remorgage your house for those vet’s x rays.
Red vehicle = good target.
.-= Tracy’s last blog post is here ..Blog candy, just what the doctor ordered. =-.
“…birds with irritable bowel syndrome and freakishly accurate aim.”
I laughed my head off at my desk at this one!! LOLOL
As for the furbaby.. I get it completely. My problematic puggle is a pain in my badonkadonk, and I can’t imagine life without him now. And he’s also taken a tumble, where… heart in throat… I’ve placed said vet call, and watched pooch make equally miraculous recovery chasing a backyard whatsit, that caught his bulging puggle eyes.
.-= Sandie McCarthy-Roberts’s last blog post is here ..April 30th 2010 – Loss =-.
I love that camera. Can I have it?!
Great post.
Hi Andy! Love the camera! Happy Birthday! I’m glad Oliver is OK. I have to get reading to catch up. Heading over to your fan page!
.-= paula @ Organizing Tips 4 Moms’s last blog post is here ..Where Have I Been? =-.
Yikes, birds with irritable bowl syndrome! Remind me to never visit NY.
Twitter: myrealreview
April 30, 2010 at 3:20 pm
LOL on the ugly!! I LIKE your facebook page now
.-= Nicole’s last blog post is here ..Canadian-Friendly Friday Link-Up =-.
Twitter: TheShoppingMama
April 30, 2010 at 3:43 pm
You can always make me giggle. I love it. I have a D90, too. And one of these days, dammit, I’m going to learn how to use it.
.-= Kate @ The Shopping Mama’s last blog post is here ..Guidecraft Center Stage Puppet Theater Review + Giveaway =-.
Twitter: Janmary3
April 30, 2010 at 4:10 pm
There is a large tree outside our cottage and I am sure all the birds “hold on” until we arrive up for the weekend, and then they “let loose” on my car!
.-= janmary, n ireland’s last blog post is here ..New Lessons and new jewelery by janmary designs with FREE shipping =-.
Congrats on the d90! I have had mine 3 months or so and I love it and I know you will too! I also have a 70-300 but its not VR like yours, I love VR!
.-= Candace’s last blog post is here ..Universal Truths =-.
Twitter: shopwithmemama
April 30, 2010 at 6:57 pm
LOL about the bird crap! haha!
Twitter: motherklunkers
May 2, 2010 at 11:37 pm
Great post! That was the first laugh I’ve had all day!
.-= SeriousMom’s last blog post is here ..Fuck isn’t a bad word. =-.
{ 1 trackback }