I need more manic in my Mondays

It’s God-awful early on a frigid cold Monday morning. Do you know where your will to live is?

Before I announce the winner of the custom line art giveaway, I wanted to thank you all so very much for celebrating my one year blogiversary with me. When I started this blog, I had no idea if anyone would read it. Would anyone really care what I do with my days? Would they really want to be on a first name basis with my husband and my kids and my cold sores? Did they really want to get up close and personal with my decrepit urinary tract that pees orange? Did they care that I suffered from a mild case of potty mouth nine days a week?

Or that upon occasion, I channel a short, anal-retentive, semi obsessive-compulsive, neurotic, pasty white, prematurely gray, astigmatic, stressed-out, paranoid, out of shape, freak of nature?

With wicked pointy elbows?

It turns out that a few of you did.

And I’m ever so grateful. More than you can ever know.

Thank you. Thank you for visiting, for listening, for commenting and for keeping me company.

From the bottom of my cholesterol infused heart.

Thank you.

And before I get all sniffly and sobby and start shouting I LOVE YOU, MAN to my monitor and embarrass us all, I’m  going to go ahead and announce the winner of the custom line art giveaway.

There were 98 entries (I LOVE YOU, MAN!) so I asked to spit out a random number between 1 and 98, inclusive, and it spewed forth the following:



And the 67th comment was posted by:




Congraulations Alli! Contact me at admin[at]thecreativejunkie[dot]com to claim your prize!

Oh, and Alli? It seems I forgot to mention in the rules that if the winner lives in Australia, he/she must call me on the phone every day for one entire week and speak to me non-stop until I go to bed. I love an Australian accent almost as much as I love Anderson Cooper.

Oh my God. If they made an Anderson Cooper with an Australian accent? You’d have to peel me off of him with Goo Be Gone.

And just for shits and giggles and because I’m trying to do whatever I can to avoid any sense of productivity this Monday morning, I thought I’d share with you who first chose as the winner of this contest:



I’ll give you one guess who #22 is.

Go ahead. Guess.

Give up?



Hi Martha! ((waving))

Of course, Martha couldn’t win her own prize. I mean, what’s the point? That’s just a big healthy dose of BIG WHOOPTY DO.

But I couldn’t resist posting her comment because, as you’ll notice, she declares to the world at large that she goes commando.

Martha, Martha, Martha.

Have I taught you nothing?

I’m going to print out 982 copies of this admission. When your oldest son brings home his first girlfriend to meet the family, I’m going to buy a ticket, fly over there and wallpaper your couch with it.

And with that, it’s entirely possible that I have found my will to live this morning.



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21 thoughts on “I need more manic in my Mondays”

  1. Avatar

    “…mild case of potty mouth…” !??? *choke* I’d hate to see you really get going, talk about peeling things off the wall…

    Hehehehe. =) Happy Monday.

  2. Avatar

    Andy I will call you on the phone any time you like.. we will just have to work out the time thing 🙂

    either that or one day I will drag the web cam kicking and screaming from the knot of cables and plugs and work out how to get it working with skype.. 🙂

  3. Avatar

    So wait, if I’d informed you that I go commando (which actually, I don’t. Ever.), I could’ve won? (Oh wait, actually, I go Boob Commando whenever possible. Which just means when I’m at home. I mean, the ladies get a bit swingy so if they’re out in public I fear not only for the safety of those within a 2 meter proximity of my person, but also for the whole Butterfly Effect thing with my heaving, swaying bosoms’ movement starting a tsunami in the Pacific or causing the Antarctic ice shelf to crack in two….) (Although, I bet if my bosoms did cause such a Butterfly Effect catastrophe, I could get a live, in-person interview with A. Coop. Just sayin’.)

    But, I didn’t win, so you don’t get to know that I go Boob Commando (Mammarymando?) (Too early in the morning and not nearly enough caffeine yet to coin new terms, sorry.) and my secret is safe. Whew.

    In conclusion, congrats to the winner. 🙂

  4. Avatar

    I only find my will to live after drinking coffee and reading your blog. Although, since my dreams have been filled with porn lately (read my blog today, you’ll see what I mean) mornings haven’t been so bad.

    Congrats to the winner!

  5. Avatar

    Congrats Alli! I’ll try to do your photo proud 😀 and Andy??? Didn’t I say in my comment that IF i won YOU would have to do a page for ME??? Didn’t I? Huh? Huh? YES m’ dear I sure did!! Since I was the “1st” winner I will hold you to that!! Will bug you at least until you do me a new blog b/g or a twitter b/g or at the very, very least a cool new rockin’ logo!! Got ya girlfriend AND I have a blog full of witnesses!! LOL

  6. Avatar

    Oh, Heather’s comment above itself is quite quotable! The one time I went commando in public (okay, I’ve probably done it more than once), I was wearing pj pants. I warned my friends that I was with that it was NOT the time to pants me for the first time…

  7. Avatar

    Congrats Alli! And how funny that Martha was the first winner…

    Andi — I’ve enjoyed reading your blog. It’s definitely a pick-me-up each morning!

  8. Avatar

    You are too funny, Andy!! Congrats on your 1 year blog anniversary. You just reminded me that it’s mine too, lol. 🙂 Hope you have many more years of entertaining us…I mean, blogging ahead of you. 😛

  9. Avatar

    Your blog cracks me up. I laughed so hard at your entry about Zoe and her new boyfriend.

    Also, my will to live is about 30 minutes away and we have our first date on Friday. So, I guess he’s not technically my will to live yet, but pretty darn close.

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