Whoever said “what goes up must come down” …

… was probably familiar with my hopes, my mood swings, my scale, my sex drive, my boobs, my hair around noon and my calculus grade in high school.

But he was obviously unfamiliar with my Oliver.

Oliver loves to go up the stairs.

Down them?

Not so much.

Unless he’s carried.

Like a baby.

Good thing he only weighs four pounds.

I think he suffers from bathmophobia.

Or is it climacophobia?

A shiny gold star to the first person who can tell me which one it is, bathmophobia or climacophobia?

Ready …

Set …


Oh, hey! All you guys frantically googling your brains out because OH MY GOD, A SHINY GOLD STAR! WHO CAN’T USE A SHINY GOLD STAR WHEN WE’RE DROWNING IN OIL SLICKS AND TAR BALLS?

Please also google urophobia and coprophobia.

Eleventy seven billion shiny gold stars and maybe even a kidney or part of my liver to the first person who can cure Oliver of either one, at least as far is it relates to coming in contact with the designated grassy area in my back yard as opposed to oh, I don’t know … my living room? Or family room? Dining room? The entire upstairs hallway?

Ready …

Set …




Share this post

24 thoughts on “Whoever said “what goes up must come down” …”

  1. Avatar

    I’m just glad he doesn’t have Arachibutyrophobia, given his love of the Kong. He definitely had a little Heatherohobbitihooveaphobia happening last week though, what with all that barking.

    In all seriousness, did you get any of the Feliway for Dogs? Because, and I quote from their website, “Comfort Zone with DAP (Dog Appeasing Pheremone) is clinically proven to reduce or completely stop stress-related behavior including: barking, whimpering and whining, chewing, urination and defacation.” That’s a couple of the phobias right there!
    .-= Heather @ nobody-but-yourself’s last blog post is here ..Operation Seven Candles =-.

  2. Avatar

    Well, our rabbit kept urinating on our carpet in defiance every time we tried to get him to do something he didn’t want to do. We had him castrated. He’s much better behaved now and revenge is sweet!!

  3. Avatar

    I am so sorry Oliver has had difficulty training his humans. You really must make peace with the fact that a furbaby weighing less than a Thanksgiving turkey will be running the house form now on. Look for piddle pads in the grocery store. Embrace his Fur Highness…

    [Our Furbaby, Miss Coco, has two teenagers and a middle-aged slave, and a senior mommy…]
    .-= Dee’s last blog post is here ..Renaissance Day Photos =-.

  4. Avatar

    Put him on a leash and drag him down 🙂 Up and down up and down every day, to desensitize him and he’ll get over it once he realises they won’t rear up and bite him in the arse. As for the onesies and twosies, ummm good luck with that!

  5. Pingback: Tweets that mention My puppy is chock full of pee, poop and phobias | --

  6. Avatar

    That is too funny! He’s still the cutest dog ever.
    Hey, would you consider being one of the host blog on my virtual book tour? I could include a book giveaway and you could do an author interview??

  7. Avatar

    LMAO!! What a cutie! Hey Jack doesn’t like to go down stairs either believe it or not! Difference is I’d get a hernia and slipped discs trying to carry his big self down 🙂

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *