Happy SITS Day! And no, I’m not giving my girly bits a bath

Just thought I’d clarify that for anyone wondering why I thought it necessary to dedicate an entire day to celebrating hooha hygiene. As for that big collective WHEW I just heard out there in cyberspace? You’re welcome!

This is Happy SITS Day, not to be confused with Happy SITZ Day, which I don’t think has been invented yet. At least, I hope not. Because otherwise? Someone’s got way too much time on their hands and needs a hobby.


SITS is an acronym for Secret is in the Sauce, a site I’ve belonged to for over 1Β½ years and through which I’ve found many wonderful blogs. Today’s my day to be featured! Which just goes to prove that if you pester someone long enough, they will eventually get so sick of you that they will agree to anything just to shut you up.


But only as it pertains to SITS. Hear that, Anderson Cooper?

Hi SITS visitors! I tried to choose three posts that give you a good insight as to how my brain works and lucky for you, I decided not to pick from my extensive collection of MY BLADDER SUCKS posts or I NAME MY COLD SORES BECAUSE THEY’RE BIG AND I’M WEIRD posts because I didn’t want to send you running and screaming for your mama right off the bat. But if you ever want to read about my neon orange pee that can be seen from space or about hideous Bernice who copped a squat on my lip and who, coincidentally, could also be seen from space, just let me know and I’ll hook you up. In the meantime, here you go:

  1. She’ll never listen to Don’t Worry, Be Happy the same way again
  2. Bovines have mad cow. Humans have stupid.
  3. Karl Malden may have left us but the streets of San Francisco are alive and well

I’ve got an extra one for those of you who don’t mind a little colorful language and some fashion commentary: Dear stupid people everywhere, especially in parking lots.

Oh, OK. FINE. For those of you who really want to be grossed out, meet Bernice and her kin. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.

To all you mamas out there whose offspring are uncharacteristically crying out for you at this very moment … they made me do it.





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196 thoughts on “Happy SITS Day! And no, I’m not giving my girly bits a bath”

  1. Avatar

    OMGOSH… are just to dang cute and FUNNY!!!!! Congrats
    on being the FB on SITS and I so do not believe that you had to
    keep at them to be it either….where have you been all my blogging
    life…you so rock!!!! Now please excuse me…I have more laughing I
    mean reading to do.


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    Whaaaaatttt??!! I didn’t do roll call today so I totally missed that you were the FB today!!!! I hope you enjoy your day…I know everyone will love your blog as much as I do!!

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    Hey lady!! Hi from SITS and may I say…CONGRATS especially after 1.5 years of loyalty, you deserve it! Your writing is hilarious…love the colorful stuff! The stupid people article had me screaming with laughter…oh man, I can relate more than I can express! So glad I’ve stumbled upon you…wish you lots of success with your site in 2010!!

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    Happy SITS (or sitz, if you prefer) Day!!! Love your posts, nice to know I’m not the only one who yells out obscenities at people in parking lots. They do it to themselves, really. Hope you have a great day!

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    happy SITS day to you! i love your button and header designs. i’m looking for something similar for my own blog. LOVE them.

    also, you are one funny momma. that parking lot story is priceless.

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    I’m loving this blog!

    Happy SITS day, btw.

    My favorite post is the ‘happy’ one. I love grossing my teenagers out with the news that their dad and I still get ‘happy’ frequently.

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    You are already cracking me up and I haven’t read your three posts yet! You are too funny! I could have SWORN I’ve been here before but I’m not sure, the name is so familiar!

    Have you been waiting long for this day? Well CONGRATS, it’s here!! Woohoo!

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    Your writing is just fantastic. I just stopped by to take a look and I ended up reading four of your post. I couldnt help my self. I was so drawn in my how creative and just plain funny you are. Thanks for the laugh! Your great!

    visiting from SITS

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    Happy Sits Day! I’m off to read your other posts…l just love how you prep everyone for “colorful” language. You can never be too careful with the holy.

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    Happy SITS Day! Never thought about the sitz baths but lol that’s pretty funny! Those sitz baths come in handy on the rare times when one needs one.

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    Holy Mackeral!! I just found your blog for the first time yesterday and lookie….today you are SITS FB! Congratulations, enjoy the attention. So glad to have met you.

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    Funny girl. I’m so glad you clarified the SITS SITZ thing cuz, frankly I was a bit worried I had stumbled into some weird cult site. But lo and behold, just a funny woman! Thanks for the laugh. Off to read some of your other posts. Glad you got picked!

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    Happy SITS day! I am glad that your blog was featured. I think that your sense of humor and I will get along JUST FINE!

    Off to start a campaign to start a “Happy Sitz Day.” Oh, wait, not enough time, and I have hobbies already. Oh, well.

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    WOO and HOO! So glad you’re the FB on SITS – I can’t believe they hadn’t featured you before!

    Just don’t go getting a swelled head over the insane number of new CJ devotees you’re doubtless going to acquire now, because swelled heads don’t fit very well in those booths at Panera.

    Enjoy the spotlight today and don’t get any hemorrhoids from being chained to your computer desk reading the comments that will be flooding in all day, because as you’ve pointed out, freakish Andy health things tend to be visible from outer space and that would just be one giant case of OUCH (and also not fit well into a booth at Panera).

    Speaking of which – lunch next week once the darlings are back at school? πŸ˜€

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    I read your “Dear Stupid People” first, and now you’ve got me hooked. Great blog, and I absolutely will come back to read more. Glad to be introduced to someone who feels the same way about things that I do! –Traci

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    Happy SITS day to you! I see I already have a few things in common with you!! We have a sweet pup named Zoey, and Helena was on our list of baby names as well, but we have 2 boys! πŸ˜‰ I’m sure I’ll enjoy browsing your links!


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    Happy SITS FB day… off to read your faves, already looking 4ward to it!

    (have fun with all the comments…I’m still trying to get back to say hi to all, and I was on Dec 1 LOL!)

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    Congrats on being SITS of the day. I’m a tad slow, I’ve been doing this SITS thing for about 2 weeks and wondered why SITS sounded just a tad bit funny, you think a mother of 4 would have caught that. They say however that each time you give birth part of your brain passes with the after birth (I figured since you name your cold sores I could say that here) so that by the time your 3rd child is born you are a numb, mindless mother who says whatever just get out of my hair, sure you can stick the keys in the electrical socket-you know you’ll only do that one time don’t you. Just kidding, I feel a need to clarify that for those that I am about to read about in your parking lot post. Anyway, thanks for clarifying why SITS rang a bell somewhere in the back of my mind, it is a good thing I had swallowed my coffee before catching that though otherwise I would be cleaning my laptop instead of commenting. As for SITZ Day, hey I’m all for it, we could combine that with Jammie Day-you know a 2fer, I’d love an excuse to sit on my bottom for a while then run around in my jammies. I’m off to read some of your posts before my kiddos (still have 2 under 18) wake up and whine all day, but I’m not drinking or eating while reading your posts, I don’t feel like cleaning my screen.

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    Shine in the spolight, revel in the attention, be joyful and happy – Today is YOUR SITS day! Hooray! And please take your sitz baths in private πŸ˜‰

    Enjoy today!

  21. Avatar

    Happy SITS Day! Enjoy your day in the spotlight! (Did it really take a year and half to become FB?) Yikes! Maybe I better put patience on my New Year’s resolution list.

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    YOu are hilarious! I’ve added you to my favorites list. And that’s a big thing since I just got a new lap top that I’m so obsessed with I don’t let hubby or kids go near it. But here you are, at the top of my brand new favorites list on my brand new lap top that I have affectionately named, Petunia. Contrats on being a SITS girl!

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    I for one am very very glad it was a happy SITS day instead of SITZ. That would be well just wrong. So very very wrong……. HAPPY SITS day!

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    Congratulations on being the FB! (FREAKING BOMB! lol) Funny you ended by mentioning “the offspring calling for you” because at that very moment they were! (wait…they ALWAYS are….) Looking forward to poking around on your blog! πŸ™‚

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    Happy SITS day! I am just starting on SITS but I can see how wonderful it is there! You have a wonderful blog and I will start following it right now! πŸ™‚ I can’t wait to get to read more of your posts!

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    Oh my goodness! I just read your stupid people post and I was rolling on the floor laughing. Some people are just so completely oblivious, right? Anyway, happy SITS day!

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    I LOVE your blog! You are just TOO funny! LOL! :o)

    Congratulations on your super special SITS celebration!! (Whew, say that 5 times really fast! :0) I hope that today you get lots and lots of comment l?ve! I look forward to coming back and exploring more and getting to know you better.

    Until then, please take care and have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!


    Teresa <

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    Happy SITS say! Congratulations on the spotlight. “Dear Stupid People” PRICELESS!
    “Miss I Managed To Shove My Size HIPPOS AT PLAY Ass Into Size Six Electric Blue Stretch Pants?”

    Oh my gosh I have laughed my butt off..thanks I needed a chuckle today. I will be back. I have a feeling your blog is going to be one of my favorites! We short chicks have to stick together!

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    That was great. I’m a little late coming over, but so glad I did. The Don’t Worry, Be Happy post was absolutely hilarious!!! Congrats on your SITS (not SITZ) feature!!

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    Sorry I am late for your SITS day (not to be confused with SITZ. LOL Wish I would have thought of that on my SITS day…funny!) But I love your blog. Off to check out more of your posts!

  32. Avatar

    I just discovered SITS today and it landed me on your quirky little blog. Refreshing to see I’m not the only nut on the tree….I also have freakishly pointy elbows (thanks Dad).

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